His Mother Likes Me

It has been three months since my ex broke up with me (we were together for two years). My ex is a mama's boy who is also a teenager at heart and refuses to grow up. He still hangs out with teenaged friends and he is 32 years old. He still collects toys, stuffed animals, and acts like a teenager. He also drinks too much and smokes too much.

And it took you only 2 years to figure that out? How remarkable.

Our breakup was kinda nasty because I wanted him back for quite a while and he found a new gf.

The reason you wanted an overgrown baby back was?...

The first time we broke up, his mom helped to get us back together.

His mom?! Hellooo, stupid?! She's looking for a replacement! The clue phone is ringing, and it's ringing for YOU!

This time, I tried everything but he didnt want to get back to me. Instead he found a new gf that is 18 years old.

Awww, right up his alley...

I am now on the verge of a life changing move. After the ex broke up with me, I spent a long time trying to get back together with him. He was adamant about not getting back together with me. Finally I gave up and decided to move on with my life. I decided to move out to San Diego and found a new job out there.

Great, just make sure you don't fall for another manchild while you're at it.

Today, as I was driving, I got a weird phone call from the ex's mother. Asks me how I am doing. She also tells me that she wants to keep in touch with me even though I am moving away. She tells me that she thinks her son, my ex, still has feelings for me and that I should give it some time. To keep some limited contact with him, and that he will come back to me. She also wanted my parents' phone number (ugh) so she could get in touch with me if need be. She told me that she thinks my ex still has feelings for me because he is sad I am leaving. She tells me that she wishes that I had ended up being her daughter in law, because she thinks I am good for him.

ROTFLMAO. I can hear her thinking all the way to here:

Oh no! That silly bitch is going to run off to San Diego and it will be YEARS before I can find another tard like her, desperate enough to take that log of wood from my hands.

I told her that if he cared about me, then why did he find a new gf. She told me that he always likes to have a girl on his arms, but she is nothing, and if I clean up my life

YOU should clean up YOUR life? For a good for nothing

(by getting rid of my gay best friend),

Homophobic,

there is a big chance he will come back to me, because one of his biggest hangups with me was that I was too close with my gay best friend (who is also my first ex).

Insecure,

She told me that, like all guys, her son likes to be the center of attention and wanted to be the center of my life.

Aging Fratboy?!

She told me that she knows it will take time for me to get my life in order but that if I keep in contact with her, and limited contact with him, there is a BIG possibility that he may come back to me.

To which you replied: STFU! And if you ever call me or my parents again I'm going to file stalking charges.

Right?

I am not sure what to do now.

Huh?

I am on the precipice of moving out to San Diego and am excited and happy about the move, but her call has unnerved me a lot since it brought up a lot of memories, feelings, and hopes that i had been trying to forget for a long time.

I give up.