He Badmouths My Mom

I have been dating a man for a few months now. He is 48 and I am 28.

There we go again.

Everything was going well and we are now at the point where we are serious. I guess I better explain about my background first. I am a 28 year old virgin. My Mom was not some strict crazy parent but she raised me with very high morals and she also raised me to marry before sex. Also, we are VERY close to the point that we are like sisters. She was a little protective of me when growing up but nothing major and and she was not crazy.

Ok. So your upbringing was not exactly the norm, which I imagine must seriously cramp your style with today´s guys. At least you sound fine with it, but what´s with the chip on your shoulder?

Anyway, the guy I'm dating is a doctor. He is trained in many things including psychology.

Those are often the ones you really have to watch out for... They can make excellent mindfockers.

The other day he told me that my Mom and I are co-dependent and that we have an unhealthy relationship because I think everything my Mom says is right. This is not true. I do value my Mom's advice very much but I by no means think she is always right and I do have disagreements with my Mom. He keeps blaming my Mom and talking badly about her past parenting skills.

Ah. That´s where you got the chip about mom.

Even if that were true, and even if your mommy dearest was the quintessential dragon herself, there are other more superior ways of solving this sort of problem, and one would expect a dr. med. psy. would know them.

Constantly bad-mouthing a girls parents and picking on her character is bad manners of the palest sort, bordering on abusive.

I'm very hurt tonight because we were talking and I asked him very casually why he got divorce from his ex wife. I was very shocked when he said that it was none of my business and he is not going to talk about the mother of his kids to me.

Excuse me? He´s not going to talk about the mother of his kids to you? One would think you´re some two-bit whore that he picked up somewhere.

This guy went totally nuts on me. He said that because I am naive, I didn't know any better than to ask a man something like this.

Actually, because you are naive, you have no idea how how normal, even sensible it is to ask why he got divorced, and how creepy, way out of line his answer was!

He said every woman knows to never ask a man why he is divorced. Can someone tell me if this is true?

Uh...no!

This guy really got angry at me. Prior to this, he has never gotten angry like this before. I was shocked and crying.

You should have run home, digged out his ex-wife´s number and called to ask her instead. Obviously the reason can only be something that would reflect really, really bad on him.

He then said, "my daughter will never be as naive as you when she is 28".

Perhaps you should ask yourself why a man who views you with nothing but disrespect and contempt wants to be your boyfriend.

This hurt me so badly because I told him there was no need to get nasty and say something like this. He really cut me deep when he said that.

And this is just the beginning, trust me.

Should I break this off?

Yes please.

Thank you.

Nothing to it.